...Elephants?

Which Naruto Character Are You?




Here is the story of how Egg Heads saved Easter.

Going home from my flat is one of those dreaded taboos - in Whitters we have no mobile phone signal and in my house the only hope of internet is the local library. Anyway, I came home recently to find my mother in a grumpy mood, the fridge bare and my dad nowhere to be found. I had left most of my decent DVDs and mangas back at the flat so it wasn’t long before I was bored - when I mentioned such matters to Frau Mothership, she suggested I meet up with Lucy and Elle, a feat that would require several texts since they live about three villages away. When I pointed such matters out, her next suggestion was to send them an email, which I was all for at first. However, this plan fell into shambles as the library was shut for the Easter holiday (meaning a fortnight at least).

Needless to say, I was soon annoyed and feeling extremely agitated. It is bad enough that the only attraction in Whitters is a wood and the closest we have to Waterstones is the free books you get on magazines sometimes - but being out of contact as well? That really, really took the biscuit.

It wasn’t so bad when I was at school, most ‘holidays’ were only a week long and hardly anyone had a mobile, so signal never came into it. Since we live literally in the middle of nowhere, there was a lot of house calls and expeditions into town just to fetch a video from Woolworths. (I’m not exaggerating when I say expedition, it’s an hour both ways). Once, I had Beth and our other friend Mary-Sue over for Halloween and we wanted a scary film to watch, so had to catch a train. Anyhow, they arrived at the house fully decked in witch garb, which later proved to be an extremely bad idea, for the suggestion was later put forward we board the train in similar condition.

So, at any rate, with no phone signal, parents that work full time, no chances of emailing anyone and absolutely no DVDs or manga lying around you would think that there was nothing left to get worse, wouldn’t you?

Admittedly, I did, but then I’m always wrong about such matters.

As I have previously mentioned, the fridge was bare when I arrived. All that was in it was a yoghurt. Dad suggested we go to Sainsbury’s to pick up some food as the freezer was empty too and I was only too happy to comply. Or at least I would have been, had the car not gone kaput as we turned to leave the house. Something to do with suspension I think, but whatever it was, we definitely weren’t going shopping.
Knackered up cars are the running joke of our family, well okay, more the running joke of my dad. I don’t think he’s ever had a fully functional one - I seem to recall stories of my laboured mother being taken to hospital by my granddad because dad’s car had broken down. The one he had before this one was the worst, the gears on it didn’t work to the point where our local mechanic said keeping it was suicide.
In the end, we ended up eating dribs, drabs and takeaway for the rest of the day, rounded off wonderfully by my mother chipping in our home phone had text message capability, why on earth hadn’t I asked earlier?

Texting Lucy and Elle over a bowl of cup a soup and rice crackers, I happened to overhear a strange whooping kind of noise coming from the sofa, which upon closer inspection turned out to be my Dad. Working in a newsagents, the most TV he gets to watch is Loose Women and Ready Steady Cook. His favourite show, mainly because he hates them with a passion, is EggHeads. He loves to watch the show - not because of it’s format or because of it’s style - simply because on the off chance that these ’geniuses’ get a question wrong he can watch and laugh.

When I questioned him as to why he was making such a racket he explained that the Eggheads were in the final rounds of the game, playing against another team. There was nothing unusual about this, except for the fact that they were losing. The Eggheads never lose! That’s the whole point of the show - no one can beat the Eggheads… The teams had come to tie break and if their final question was incorrect, they would lose £27,000.

Dad was gripping the seat as the question was announced, but personally I didn’t see the point. I all ready had visions of the outcome; in true Egghead fashion they would smile, nod and slip out an answer like the two times table. Their question was geography based and immediately my dad began the ‘eeny meeny miny mo’ on the three answer options. Funny thing was, based on their expressions, the Eggheads didn’t know either.

It took at least five minutes for them pass, losing £27,000 in the process. I looked at my dad. My dad looked at me.
We laughed solidly until the credits were over.

When you’re having a truly awful day, it’s true that news of someone else’s can make you feel a whole lot better about the situation.